Scot Bastian Ph.D.
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We the People Project: Changing the National Motto

10/22/2016

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I've been a little lax about updating my blog of late. But now that we're deep into the political season (Don't forget to vote on November 8th!) I thought I'd update my little foray into a political activism event that I attended last summer. On June 29th I participated in the "We the People Rally" in support of changing our current national motto "In God We Trust" back to the original "E Pluribus Unum,"which translates as "Out of Many, One." The rally, located near the Washington State Capitol building in Olympia, was organized by Robert Ray. It was a small crowd, that was dwarfed by the adjacent "Decision America" event run by Rev. Franklin Graham. I think this is an issue that is of national importance. The original motto was changed largely in response to cold war paranoia in the 1950s, and I think we should revert to the older, much more inclusive, motto. There were several speakers at the rally. Videos of many of them are available at this link.  
   Below is a copy of the entirety of my speech, and below that is a video of my delivery. Hopefully, we will eventually succeed in this effort.
​"America was founded as an escape from religious domination. Since then, we have had a long history of rancorous disagreements, fostered by a rich palette of dissenting views and differing opinions. Some of these conflicts have been resolved amicably, some not. But America is not, and should never be, a singular voice. A lone voice, amplified by the masses, is the very essence of fascism. It is ingrained in our constitution and our public ethos that we should all have a voice. It is what defines us. This has led to the most important political invention of all time, the ballot box. Respect for our differences is what makes us strong. It is well known that an alloy of tempered steel is stronger than iron. Not since the Viet Nam War, perhaps not since the Civil War, have we lived in a country so divided. We are torn by racial discord, by differences in sexual identity, by vast differences in wealth, and by differences in belief or non-belief in god or gods. But, I believe, if we are to survive, if we are to thrive, we must do more than tolerate our differences. We must celebrate our diversity. We live in a country defined by blue states and red states. But, I wish, I so dearly wish, that America could be purple. I dream of a purple rainbow. This, is why we need a motto, not that separates us into believers and non-believers, but that unites us all. E Pluribus Unum: From the many, one. "
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The Great White Mouth--a Political Stump Speech For Best Animal on the Planet

12/31/2015

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​      THE GREAT WHITE MOUTH
​I like to cruise. Back and forth, looking left, then right. It’s great to be the most badass fish in the ocean. That’s me. Look at ‘em scatter! I can eat anything! The Universe is my bitch! What does not kill me, makes me stronger. And NOTHING kills me. All those limp-finned wimps out there can suck on my dorsal. I’m a shark among minnows! I go back 400 million years. Longer than the dinosaurs. BETTER than the dinosaurs! Like those pussy Tyrannosaurus Rex—with their pussy seal-baby arms. (Waving his arms.)  “Look at me! I’m a little dino-pussy!”

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​I hear the dino-dicks got killed by little-shit mammals that ate their eggs. I’m not surprised. Wimps. What they needed to do was build a big fence and keep those little bastards out. If they did that, they wouldn’t have any problems. That’s what I am—a problem solver. I drive a hard bargain, and I back it up with some teeth! 

So, if you wanna be part of this, and make Earth the best planet in the Galaxy, you’re gonna vote for me for top animal. Be a part of a winner! Thank you. Better yet, you should thank me.
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WATCH IT! a Christmas Sketch for Skeptics

12/18/2015

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WATCH IT
    by Scot Bastian
​
ELFIE
(Singing in italics)
You better watch out
You better not cry--
 
SAM
—Wait! Wait! What’s wrong with crying? I mean, just ‘cause I’m male doesn’t mean I don’t have feelings too!
 
ELFIE
It’s just a song. The idea is you’re supposed to be happy.
 
SAM
I resent being told how I should feel. My feelings are my own.
 
ELFIE
Lemme start over.
You better watch out--
 
SAM
—What am I watching out for anyway?
 
ELFIE
Hold on, you’ll find out later in the song.
You better watch out.
You better not cry
You better not pout
I’m telling you why--
 
SAM
—You’re awful pedantic, aren’t you?
 
ELFIE
(deep sigh)
Santa Claus is coming to town--
 
SAM
—Yeah, so what?
 
ELFIE
He knows when you are sleeping
He knows when you’re awake--
 
SAM
—Jesus! This guy have a camera in my bedroom? What a creep!
 
ELFIE
He knows when you been bad or good.
So be good for goodness sake.
 
SAM
Who the fuck does he think he is? Why is he the ultimate judge of bad and good? Sheesh!
 
ELFIE
Santa Claus is coming
Santa Claus is coming
Santa Claus is coming--
 
SAM
—Well, tell him to come already, I’m sick and tired of the foreplay!
 
ELFIE
Santa Claus is coming to town!
 
SAM
Sounds more intrusive than the NSA!
 
ELFIE
You really, don’t get the Christmas spirit, do you?
 
SAM
I’m gonna buy me a gun. I need protection from this guy.
 
ELFIE
Merry Christmas.
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A Poem for Geeky Skeptics

8/11/2015

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GO BOLDLY
   by Scot Bastian (with apologies to Dylan Thomas)
Is there a quark in your belfry?
A meme in your bonnet?
Do you, and yours, wax eusocial?
Do you try to grok the neurosciences?
Are you a heterogeneous, Homo sapiens, or, perhaps, a transhumanist?



Do you argue:
Charon or Karon?
Sagan or Tyson?
Cosmos 1 or 2?
Star Wars or Star Trek?
Kirk or Picard?
And who is right:
Hawking and Musk, or Krause?
Are your dreams peppered with the stars of the cosmos, rather than the stars of    Hollywood?
Do you love NASA more than the NFL?
Do you dream of androids dreaming of electric sheep?
Do you love spiders and snakes?

Do you ask these questions--and dream these dreams?
Then, I extend my welcome. 
For you and I are in the same tribe.

We are star stuff.


I exhort you!
Do not go gentle into that vacuous pit of the culturally inane
Rage, rage against the dumbing of the mind!

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Are You Suffering Religious Cognitive Dissonance?

7/26/2015

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A few days ago I put the following quip on Facebook:
I find it interesting that what many call a "faith crisis" is what I consider a "reality epiphany."
Based on the number of "likes" it has been receiving, this is a pretty popular sentiment. I wonder how many of my fellow skeptics, atheists, ignostics, agnostics, humanists, freethinkers--whatever you in what I think of as the rational community--are often annoyed when we are told we "lack faith" as if it is some kind of deficiency? "If we only would try to believe." "If only we would pray." "If only we would open the door to ask God's grace." The torrent of condescension seems to never end.  Even worse, is when we're told that "atheism is just another faith." Ridiculous. Somewhere I've seen the sentiment that atheism is another faith the way that baldness is another hairstyle. Yes, science has it's assumptions, such as reproduciblility. Yes, scientists rely on mathematical and physical laws. But that's a far cry from inventing unicorns, angels,talking snakes and virgin births.
   I guess this blog entry is more of a rant than I originally wanted it to be when I started writing. 
   But, occasionally, there is a news item that gives me hope that humanity, however slowly, is turning away from the supernatural ghosts of the past. Here is a link to a news story of a group of a hundred people who en masse resigned from the Mormon Church. Welcome fellow realists. Turning away from supernatural deities and beliefs can lead to some uncomfortable conclusions, not the least of which is facing mortality rather than some kind of fake transition into a netherworld, or heaven, or some form of reincarnation. But, really, if you have any respect for the truth, isn't that, in the end, more satisfying than a comforting delusion?
 
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The Solution to the Earthquake and Overcrowding Issues in Seattle and Portland   

7/17/2015

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A recent New Yorker article about the precarious position that us Northwesterners find ourselves in, regarding the potential for a massive earthquake has created a bit of a collective stir in paranoid consciousness. The article suggests, if the big one hits, everything west of Interstate-5, might be "toast." This has created quite a hornets nest of fear in the more skittish members of the local populace. This collective anxiety reminded me of the planet Bethselamin, from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Universe, by legendary author Douglas Adams. Here is the wikipedia description of the planet:

Bethselamin is a fabulously beautiful planet which attracts billions of tourists each year. Unsurprisingly, cumulative erosion is a serious concern of the local authorities. Their solution is to calculate the net imbalance between the amount of matter eaten and the amount subsequently excreted by each visitor, and remove the weight difference through amputative surgery. Thus it is vitally important to get a receipt after every trip to the lavatory while on the planet.

How is this related? I have a novel hypothesis on why this threat, which has really been here all along, has only recently become a hot topic of discussion. The reason is that, similar to Douglas Adams' planet, the risk of earthquake has been significantly enhanced by the collective humanity that has poured into the region. It is simple physics. There is now more weight in this region of the country from all the human beings moving here, which creates an imbalance in the subduction zone, which might exacerbate seismic activity. As far as I know this idea is completely novel, and this hypothesis awaits testing by the scientific community. But, until testing confirms my theory, I propose that we take the following precautions; 1) No one will be allowed to move to Seattle or Portland unless they can persuade at least two people to leave. This has the dual benefit of ameliorating some of the problems with traffic congestion and the housing shortage that have plagued Seattle recently. 2) If you feel compelled to visit, you must pay a homeless person (and house and feed them, of course) to travel elsewhere during the duration of your stay. This idea also has multiple benefits. It provides gainful employment to the indigent population and encourages tourism (and cultural exchange!) between different regions of the country.
   I realize this is a novel idea, and will likely be controversial, but it is my hope that this small blog entry will be a starting point of community discussion, that will lead to endless town hall meetings, followed by the formation of an actionable change in public policy, followed by more public discussion, and eventual death in committee. Spread the word. We need to take action on this now.
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Waiting For Boa--the Video!

5/22/2015

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Finally! My short play, "Waiting For Boa" which was part of the showcase of plays from in the Writer's and Actors Reading and Performing (WARP) show "WARP Springs a Gnu" in May 2014, is available on video. The play, which was directed by John Paul Sharp and Jason Dooley, starred Brendan Mack and Julian Garcia as the rats Elmo and Ben, Joshua Moore as the snake and Beatrix Turner-Rodriguez as the hand and voice.  The video was shot by Stacy Kwimm. Special thanks to Jeff Weedman for loading it up on Youtube.
   As described previously on this blog, the comedy was based on a true story. Several years ago I visited my cousin and her young son owned a caged boa constrictor. Next to the cage was another cage containing Snakie's prospective dinner--a couple of caged rats. What were the rats thinking? What was Snakie thinking? Watch the video below and find out. Below the video are some pics taken by Carl Nelson of the first performances. 
   A special thanks to everyone involved in this production. I love this play and thought everyone did a spectacular job. 

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Lack of Life Valley--A Skeptical Sketch

5/18/2015

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I am very proud of the production of my short play "Lack of Life Valley," which was part of a showcase of plays produced by Writers and Actors Reading and Performing (WARP). The WARP show, entitled Playwright Under Pressure, was produced by Ellen Covey. The play was directed by Justin Ordonez and starred Justin Ordonez, as the tall vulture, Jeff Weedman, as the short vulture, and Ashley Salazar, as the bunny. All of them did a great job. Below are a couple of still photos from the production, and below that is a video. Enjoy.
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Silly Muslims

1/9/2015

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I really don't know what the problem is. (From here.)
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Trepidation About Trepanation?

1/1/2015

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   What is your favorite surgery? Mine, without a doubt, is trepanation. Trepanation is the deliberate creation of a hole in the head using surgery, exposing the Dura Mater (thick covering) of the brain. This website, "The Trepanation Guide" which advocates trepanation, describes it as "...oldest surgical procedure practiced by mankind."  I found what I consider a more responsible description in Wikipedia as "perhaps the oldest surgical procedure for which there is archaeological evidence." After all, doesn't it seem reasonable that soft tissue surgeries, such as castration or appendix removal, may have been performed or attempted, without leaving a trace?
   Evidence of trepanation is widespread, and has been traced back to neolithic times in Europe and at least 2500 years ago in South America. Below are pictures of an Incan skull from Peru (left). In ancient Peru trepanation was apparently fairly common--approximately 1000 Incan skulls have been identified. The picture on the right was discovered in Germany. One archaeological site in France identified 40 out of 120 skulls that had been trepanated. Many trepanated skulls have multiple holes, with the margins of "successful" surgeries often showing signs of healing. Sharper edged holes may indicate an "unsuccessful" surgery. Success rates have been estimated 75-80% in South America, and a remarkable 90% in Europe. 


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   I find it surprising that, given the absence of antibiotics and modern anesthesia, that they had any success at all.
   Why would anyone want to have a hole bored in their head? One can imagine that ancient humans might have used the technique to try and treat headaches, dizziness, epilepsy, evil spirits, tumors, head injuries, hematomas, etc.--virtually anything that might be related to the head. But, widespread use of trepanation and the presence of as many as 4, 5 or even 7 holes, might suggest a ritual aspect of the surgery. With the advent of modern medicine, trepanning has largely, gone the way of blood letting and bulbing, as an archaic treatment. There are modern, defensible uses of trepanation, to treat hematomas and assorted brain surgeries, but, of course, the bone is generally replaced after the surgical procedure (Many docs play golf. I wonder if they mumble to themselves "Always replace your divots," at the close of surgery.)
   However, there are a few advocates of the surgery for its supposed psychological benefits. Bart Huges, sometimes spelled Hughes, saw trepanation as a "pathway to higher consciousness." A recurring theme that I see in advocates is that it is an attempt to increase blood flow to the brain in an attempt to recapture the plasticity and "happier and more energetic" state of mind in an infant. The rationale is that the flexible fontanel (soft spot) in a baby's cranium allows for more blood flow, which is restricted with hardening of the skull as we mature. The result of the surgery, as the "Trepanation Guide" expresses it, is that you are “…happier, more energetic and less prone to crippling bouts of ennui. You'll ascend to the child's plane of acute consciousness from which you disembarked to enter the lowly malaise of adulthood." 
   Hmm, to put it mildly, I have my doubts regarding the benefits.
   Joey Mellen wrote a book called Bore Hole, which described his experiments with trepanation. His first attempt was unsuccessful. Mellen ended up hospitalized and was recommended for "psychiatric evaluation." His second attempt, with the aid of his girlfriend Amanda Fielding, worked. As Mellen described it,

“After some time there was an ominous sounding schlurp and the sound of bubbling. I drew the trepan out and the gurgling continued. It sounded like air bubbles running under the skull as they were pressed out. I looked at the trepan and there was a bit of bone in it. At last!”

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   Yeeesh, not something I would want to go through. Fielding later trepanned herself. Here is a link to an interview with Amanda Fielding, who founded the Beckley Foundation, which investigates consciousness and advocates drug reform, ran for office in the British Parliament in 1979 and 1983, although she described her candidacy as more of an "art project," intended to "try to get the medical profession to agree that [tepanation] is an interesting subject and is worthy of research,"rather than a serious attempt to get elected. Below is an interesting campaign poster. 


 There is an hour long documentary called "A Hole in the Head," which is available for purchase. I haven't seen the film, but it might be interesting. 
   If you want more info more on trepanation I recommend the Skeptic's dictionary and from this article from Charles D. Gross at Princeton. 
   Let me close with a couple videos. On the left is an interview with Bobby Lund, an advocate of trepanation, and on the right is a toe-tappin' light-hearted look at the process(along with some other interesting history of anatomy) from Zoochosis. 

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    Scot Bastian Ph.D. is a scientist and artist who lives in Seattle WA.

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